Have you ever fallen to your knees in gratitude?

Two weeks ago, when our retreat group practiced its last healing flow together at Menla, I experienced something amazing.

As I moved through Urdhva Hastasana, I looked up, and something profound came over me.  I couldn’t help but begin to sob.

Rejoicing in the moment, I continued my practice, as my teacher, Erica—in an act of kindness—brought me some tissues.

It was a miracle I was there, after all.  The last seven months were spent recovering from major surgery, blood transfusions, and six rounds of chemo.  But, I was—in that moment—moving my body, breathing, feeling, growing.

All of the glorious signs of being alive.

Overcome with this gratitude, I couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of humility.

How do I deserve this?

A similar thing happened to me this morning, when I was praising God and thanking Him for all of the lessons I’ve received on this journey, for being cancer free, for giving me a second chance at life.  For all I have to live for.

As I dropped to my knees in tears, a call came in from a number I didn’t recognize.  The school where I am hoping to volunteer was calling to set up an interview.  As I wiped my eyes and nose, I put the phone down for just a moment.  Realizing there are no coincidences…

Lord, I thank you for this offering.

My heart is so very full.  I am astounded.  I have to, at times, pinch myself to confirm my existence.  The gifts I’ve received—the doors that have opened—have been nothing short of miracles.

I knew my life would change after cancer.  I just didn’t have any idea.

Namaste.